Been busy hopping around and came across Mike Foster’s crafty and very interesting blog. He’s into blogging and Social Networking and even composed a song out of it…
This post is supposed to be an invitation to all bloggers who are Crazy about Social Networking, but it led me to my gripes about people or friends (as they call themselves).
Although it’s driving me nuts and I want to get away from it all, I still find myself visiting blogs, profiles, forums – reading and commenting if I think I have something “good” to say. But most of the times it frustrates me to find no response. I don’t know if this is just the side effect of my DMPA or that I’m naturally sensitive and emotional.. Anyway, I remember shouting out when I was in my crazy teenage years…
I’m sick and tired of reaching out to people who don’t even realize my worth.
That goes to my highschool classmates and so-called friends whom I gave my full attention and devoted my time to. Being the keeper and the sensitive type that I am, I hold on to friendships so tight that ironically made me suffocated.
I don’t understand why would they add me as their “friend” in their Friendster, Facebook, or Multiply profiles. Oh, yeah, they want to update me what’s going on with their lives. How about the Inbox or the Comment Wall? Why don’t they make use of it? Oh, they do. But only with their “friends“. I hope I can suggest to these Networking sites to add a category list like in Chat messengers where you categorize people in your list as friends, family, classmates, contacts, or stalkers spectators.
Because of unresponded messages, it makes socializing no fun. It’s the same scenario like in highschool wherein students are grouped into the popular ones, the geeks, the cool, the bad guys, the low profile and a loner. I’m not at all impressed.
A few weeks back, I’ve joined a contest to write why I am blogging. It made me realize a lot of things and one of them is why still I keep on reaching out to other people although I know it would hurt me to find nothing in my inbox.
Well I guess, some people are listeners, others are the speakers. Some follow, some don’t. But if you do I want to know why you left me a message and why you added me as your friend. Do you have something to say? Or you think I have something good to say? Will you listen when I talk.. will you read my blogposts although you think you won’t get paid for it? Will you comment on my discussion because you think have something important to add, or because you’ll just get a cent from responding? If you think what I’ve said is worthwhile, would you share it to the world in my credit?
One of the reasons why I joined these Networking Sites is to promote my blog and my other online revenue gigs. But it’s not always about the money. I know I shouldn’t be wasting my time slacking around, clicking and dropping here and there, but socialization is a need. I’m just human and I want to belong and be appreciated and accepted. I want to be a part of other people’s lives and I want to share what I have.
Maybe that’s what I need to understand. I should learn to accept people for what they are so I won’t be frustrated if they forgot to greet me on my birthday or to say “Hi, what’s up?” every once in a while.
So, anyway.. I think it’s fun to join Mike Fosters’ contest. Here’s what Mike wants you to do:
- Tell me your most bizarre social networking story. Or…
- Watch my social networking video and describe what it means to you. Or…
- Make up a social networking story, combing both the bizarre and my video.
Check out his site now for more details. The deadline is on May 8. My daughter and Hunny’s birthday. aw..
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
Hi fedhz!
Please forgive me if I sometimes fail to respond to your comments. I truly am very thankful for your very nice comments and how you respond on twitter.
Thanks for the invitation for the contest!
Advance Happy Birthday to them!
God Bless!
JeD Chan
Now I know why you can relate to Holly’s advice to me about people in the net and off it.
Do you know I have hard time adjusting my definition of friends in social networks? In the net you only have to have a minimum of say mutual interest to be called and qualify as a friend. What’s wrong with me initially is I try to bring my real life standards of friendship with my online life. And that can well set you up for some real disappointment.
As you said – where are the messages? Why no word from them at all? Are they really friends.
I have since taken all these corruptions of the word friends with a little more patience. And can now live with it.
My belief is that I’d be surprised if friendship online really progresses into a meaningful true-blue friendship. If not, well I’d chalk it up to life’s being unfair and all that.
This makes my cynical? No, I’m just being practical and casual about it. I’d try every time not to expect too much. Too much expectation will only set me up for disappointment.
Hmmn, splendid post. I like! “,)
hi! maybe their birthday will be another one of your lucky days!
hey, i didn’t notice that the new twitter avatar is a product of your newly-found hobby, digiscrapping! ang liit kasi sa twitter eh.
i don’t know why some people join social networking sites and not respond to comments or messages. i get excited when someone sends me a message. you’re right, not everyone of your so-called friends in your networks are really friends. i look at it like karma, i give them as much warmth as they are giving me. good thing my real friends and i take advantage of social networking sites to really keep up with each other’s lives and keep the friendships warm. ;p
if they are ignoring you, don’t get bothered. it’s their loss that they missed a dose of your warmth and sweetness and missed the smile that you wished to draw on their faces.
Baka nasa tagaytay kami ng family ko on Mother’s Day. Na-excite naman ako. O diba dito ako nag reply hehehe!
that is great to know about the rotate ad
I like to ask is that my winning of ad space is 3 months does it mean if you put both ad it will run for 3 months?
my other blog is http://sherryshopping.blogspot.com the ad code at the blog
Hey! I know this guy (well, not really know) in EC and he’s really creative huh!
Well, about social networking, we cannot force everyone to be active on it. We have our own daily worries and we don’t have the luxury of time to respond to anyone… I am guilty of this as I just have too much in my hand, no time for ‘em all!
@JedChan: Hi! No prob! I like visiting your blog and replying to your tweets. I also appreciate you visiting and commenting on my blog. I know there’s nothing much you can relate to here, but you return visits, and that’s enough for me. I’m happy that you come back once in a while.
Will you join the contest? Mike Foster is not replying. ^^
@Jan: Hey, haha! yeah, Actually this post is for my “highschool friends” who don’t even peek into my world. they are just there when they need something from me and that’s what hurt me.
I’m really happy to have found new “friends” here online and I don’t expect that much from those newly found friends because I know my blog is not that interesting to read. (i’m not self-pitying) hehe.
My tummy gets tickled when I receive comments esp from people like you who I know really reads my post and comment soulfully. I really appreciate that.
We all have different definition to friendship, and I also call my friends as such, like my Mylot friend, my Ciao friend, or blogger friend. It’s easier that way than saying my mylot acquaintance or my mylot co-member, LOL.
Yeah, it’s not being cynical but being practical and realistic. Like what I said, some people are readers some are “talkers”. I guess I’m a little bit of both, and people may be too.
hmm. can I install JS-kit in wordpress? hehe
Fedhz, perhaps you should first consult your boyfriend about installing JS-kit. There are better commentluv plugins for WP.
I stick with JS-kit simply because it’s the nearest thing I can have to a commentluv integration. Perhaps you ask Jed’s opinion, too on this.
In my experience, I use the term friend loosely nowadays. I can’t be too snooty with my definition of it anyway. I need every friendly soul out there. Because I’m always plugged in the net I thought I had better make full use of it by surrounding myself with like-minded persons, or friends as I call them.
It makes staying online more enjoyable. If only my real friends are as internet savvy I’d be doubly blessed – they use the occasional email, they are hardcore friendster users, but beyond that – nil. But I’m patient. Who knows what surprises tomorrow may bring, right? “,)
@peppermayo: hello! I really am lucky to have my daughter and my hunny in my life. That’s enough, I guess. ^^
ung avatar po sa Tweet pic lang talaga yun. nilagyan ko lang ng background dito sa post hehe.
about my so-called friends, haha! my “angst” goes to my old friends who regularly updates their friendster/facebook accts, but don’t even reply to my “pokes” or paramdam to them. Maybe I’m not the popular. or dahil inaway ko sila dati? ewan ko ba.
saya naman ng friends mo. updated kayo lagi. siguro mabaet ka lang talaga, kaya “karma” mo yan. salbahe kase ako nung HS, kaya siguro ayaw na nila ako makausap. LOL.
salamat sa laging pagrespond ha, mapasaan man, sa twitter, sa ym, email at sa blog, hehe!
@Enchie: wow, sarap naman! sama mo me! di ako natuloy kela Pehpot, huhu!
@Webbielady: halu! unfortunately, Mike Foster is not replying to my messages. So I’m really clueless if this contest is still up. Anyway, it’s a good way to blurt out my “angst” LOL.
No, no, this is not for you. Actually, I’m really glad to have found new friends and that I’m really super grateful for every messages you leave me, here in my blog, your tagboard, and email. I know how busy you are. I love reading your “long” emails haha! super! So, please please don’t feel bad about it. ^^
@Jan: I guess everybody has each own definition of “friends”. nakakainis lang kase kapag may kelangan sila tska lang nila ako naaalala. haha!
Anyway, I am really happy to have new friends in this social networking thingy. super saya ko kapag nakakareceive ako ng comment sa blog ko (minsan kahit di related) hehe.
At least your friends are catching up with you. Pwede bang hiramin ung mga friends mo? haha! Sige na nga, wait ko na lng yang surprises na darating. ^^ hehehe
Ah good Fedhz! Even my colleagues at work encourage me to join more SN but if I know i don’t have much time, i don’t commit…but at times, especially at this time, I think it’s kind of a “need” na.
I always leave comments and always read comments. Comments can be more fun than the original post that stimulated them.
Congratz Fedhz! Heard from Mike Foster that you have won this contest! I’m really happy for you!
Share your blessings! ;P
Keep it up Fedhz!
God Bless!
JeD Chan
http://jedchan.com
Dear Fedhz
I am with you in your assessment that online friends are no friends because most of these go on adding for their selfish ends, including Mike Foster who happens to be my friend also on facebook. I have visited his blog, seen his video and favored his blog on networkedBlogs but he has never responded to all my unilateral moves.
Abot you, I have a complaint – I tried to find some information on your goodself through your blog to assess whether you fit my friendship criterea, but found nothing here and returning without doing anything here except a casual unattended visitor. It pains me. At least, a visitor is eligible to know you.
well, at the time of typing, she already has remedied that and posted her About page. Quite informative, actually
@Webbielady: thanks again. I know you’re busy, but yeah, it’s really a need. We need people no matter what. That’s why I can never be a hermit. haha!
@Barry: although your message sounded like a spam, yeah, I love reading the comments because they add life to the post.
@Ram: Oh, hello there! I know I know. I’m sorry, I still haven’t posted my ABOUT ME page. It’s still in the making. I wanted to it to be super special, but I guess simplicity is still the best. Thank you for reminding me. I will have to put an end to my procrastination and continue working on it. ^^ hope to see you here again soon. I stopped by your blog but I’m kinda lost there.
I guess Mike Foster is too busy. He just posted the winner (and that’s me) in his blog.
O, sige Fedhz, sa iyo na lang mga iyan. Namumuyat lang naman sila sa akim. Kwento ng kwento sa blog posts ko. Gusto ko ng maglatag ng banig pero parang di uubra. Ahahaha.
Alam kasi nila I’m a sucker for good conversations. Eh adik me eh – they see through that gruffness that I sometime put on. They know me very well in that respect.
O ano, ibabalot ko na mga ‘to? “.)
@Jan: haha, pansin ko nga. di ko alam bigla ka na lang susulpot with message sa blog ko or sa twitter eh, hehe. haha, cute. banig ha. next post ko may banig. haha. para ngang telenovela mga blogposts mo sa dami ng comments eh. nalulunod na ko hehe.
sige, pakibalot mo na, hehe!
at eto pla ang award-winning article mo ha. bravo, bravo! *standing ovation*